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Comments

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Celebrity gun fail: Jose Canseco blows off his own finger

Red4man Re:Common sense (11 comments)

I hope you don't need the computer to wipe your butt...
Of course not, he uses a belt sander.

yesterday
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Celebrity gun fail: Jose Canseco blows off his own finger

Red4man Re:Common sense (11 comments)

And just where the hell have you been?

yesterday
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A Library For Survival Knowledge

Red4man Re:A plow for a geek? (260 comments)

And how would you know this, belt sander boy?

2 days ago
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The Kevlar Kandidate Gets Some Help

Red4man Re:Guy saves you from becoming Illinois (22 comments)

There are 18 states more dependent on Federal Money than Texas (putting them in the middle third), and the only thing saving the national Employment rate is the "Texas Miracle"... aka Fracking.

LINK

But by all means, don't let the facts interfere with your hyper-partisan fellating of Obama.

If Texas were to secede, I'd move there. Well... if Walker wins I'll probably stay here. Not sure I could find a good pirogi in the South.

5 days ago
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PCGamingWiki Looks Into Linux Gaming With 'Port Reports'

Red4man Gabe Newell is perhaps the biggest driver of this. (74 comments)

... not complaining, as I am a Linux user, but Steam OS is going to be the game changer, and the back catalog working on Steam is arguably more important than two AAA titles.

The Seismic Event would be Newell confirming Half-Life 3... and saying it's coming to Steam OS (Linux) first.

about a week ago
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It's Official: Joe Biden's Son is a GOP Candidate

Red4man Re:I don't understand (91 comments)

Things that are just as difficult - getting rid of me, and damn_registrars getting laid.

Because let's face it, there are some things even a whore won't do.

about a week ago
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It's Official: Joe Biden's Son is a GOP Candidate

Red4man Re:I don't understand (91 comments)

A peek behind the curtain... I created the Red persona as a way to fool the trolls into thinking I was one of them, and then get them to applaud me when I insulted them and beat them at their own game... I'm a countertroll; I fight fire with fire -- only I'm far funnier then the low talent hacks we have for trolls around here. My plan worked, and works, flawlessly - though I just don't have time to be Red lately.

I mean, think about the list of trolls around here that are gone. I take credit for that, because when it came down to it, they just couldn't hang with the Big Dog, baby. They're gone or using other accounts because I completely devastated them.

The truly brilliant part, was the concept of the Fab 4. Ultimately, I created Red as a symbol, that anyone could be... hey, just like Batman!

HEAR THAT, DUMBASS? I'M THE GODDAMN BATMAN. AND I'M BETTER LOOKING THAN BEN ASSLICK^H AFFLECK.

Love and Kisses,
Red ... so who wants me to come back and play? ... I think I've got one more run in me. Hand me that plaid flannel shirt.

about a week ago
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Cute, there.

Red4man Re:... perhaps (7 comments)

See my sig for a partial list of his sock puppet accounts. And be prepared to be accused of just being me, AC.

about 5 months ago
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SpaceX To Present Manned Dragon Capsule

Red4man Re:About time. (128 comments)

Shouldn't you wait for Luna Park to be built first?

Slow Down Cowboy!

Slashdot requires you to wait between each successful posting of a comment to allow everyone a fair chance at posting a comment.

It's been 83 minutes since you last successfully posted a comment

... but I have positive Karma and am contributing to a discussion, Slashbots!

And you guys wonder why Digg and Reddit kick sand in your face on a daily basis.

about 5 months ago
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Should We Eat Invasive Species?

Red4man Re:On that note (290 comments)

You obviously don't know very many Canadians!!!

Which means just one thing: He's very lucky.

Canaduh sucks.

about 5 months ago
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Bombs away, bitches

Red4man Re:Don't worry about a thing (5 comments)

You're welcome.
LOVE AND KISSES,
Red

Lameness filter encountered. Post aborted! Filter error: Don't use so many caps. It's like YELLING.
Lameness filter encountered. Post aborted! Filter error: Don't use so many caps. It's like YELLING.

about 5 months ago
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Ramalama...

Red4man Re:Is the first one real? (17 comments)

I find it mildly amusing that my nick name for Captain Splenda, the low calorie troll substitute, is catching on. I think CS would be amused, too.

He's good people. And a dumbass, naturally.

about 5 months ago
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Ramalama...

Red4man Re:Is the first one real? (17 comments)

Sucralose is Splenda, and it's in everything. It's no big deal, either, and is probably not as bad for you as high fructose corn syrup.

gives out a product made in an illegal settlement -- OK, that's bullshit right there. For literally ALL OF HUMAN HISTORY land conquered in a war is owned by the victors. Israel didn't start the 6 day war, but they sure as hell won it.

about 5 months ago
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Fed up

Red4man Re:upside down (12 comments)

I've noticed when I post he stops. This trend has been occurring since Thursday or Friday of last week.

Note: I'm not complaining.

Most of the people I troll / trolled I actually kind of like, but every rule has an exception.

about 5 months ago

Submissions

Red4man hasn't submitted any stories.

Journals

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It's not a coincidence...

Red4man Red4man writes  |  yesterday ... that I make a comeback and the usual gang of idiots goes quiet.

I suppose it's difficult to post when you're cowering in the corner, quivering over a puddle of your own urine, worried about my amazingly humorous comebacks to the inane drivel you generate.

Of course, if you're cowering, quivering, etc, and realize that if you go quiet and don't post anything that I can't troll you, well, you're right -- AND THAT WAS MY GOAL ALL ALONG.

Either way, kids, I win.

LOVE AND KISSES,
Red

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I early voted...

Red4man Red4man writes  |  about a week ago ... for Scott Walker.

As Hillary would say, if you don't like it you can suck my clit and balls.

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Upcoming Redesign

Red4man Red4man writes  |  1 year,21 days

Slashdot - Stale News for Nerds, Stuff that Doesn't Matter, Eyebleeding Layout by SBNation making your eyes bleed since 2013.

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Cialis VS Viagra

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 2 years ago

Buy Cialis is called secondary impotence. Men with impotence often cease to attempt sexual intercourse, choosing to overload slashdot with spam journal entries selling a product that they require, so that they're able to continue to masturbate over boobless wonders like Natalie Portman and Kate Hudson. Three other problems may occur separately or together with impotence : x Loss of libido is reduced or lost sexual interest or initiative. Reduced libido may also result partly from illnesses, medications, ps Cialis, INN- tadalafil, DES-Tardasil.

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FUCK YOU, SLASHDOT!

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 2 years ago Great. Wonder what you guys will break for that. Half the fun of visiting slashdot is to see "What did they completely fuck up today?"

Of courrse, half as fun is reading the comments to see who's dick the slashbot collective is sucking.

You know, I've been here a while..and it's time for a coup de gras.

Go Fuck Yourself, San Diego. You too, Slashbots!

Some fun fact for slashbots:

Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure. Natalie Portman isn't that attractive, she has no tits and the body of a 10 year old boy. Oh, wait, that's why you like her. Got it.

Cowboy Neal has his own zip code. When he sits around his house, he really sits around his house. The shoe shiners love him, because they know they don't actually have to shine his shoes, and that he has to take their word for it. Cowboy Neal hasn't seen his own penis without the help of a mirror since 3rd grade.

Samzenpus is a portmanteau of "Sam's a Pussy" which he ironically wishes he had... along with the body of a 10 year old boy so the slashbots would find him attractive.

Good bye, Slashdot. Goodbye, useless virgin slashbots. May all your parent's basements flood so you have to go out into the real world.

LOVE AND KISSES (but not really)

Red

P.S. For the Journal Circle Jerk: ROMNEY / RYAN 2012. WHY? BECAUSE I HATE YOU ALL AND WANT YOU TO DIE POOR, ALONE, AND NAKED IN THE FREEZING COLD LIKE YOU DESERVE.

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Just to be clear...

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 2 years ago Because if so, perhaps you should look in the mirror and find out who is really a bully.

Let's face it - the obsessive compulsive stalking and harassment you've done to people around here constitutes cyber-bullying. You're easily the worst offender. Multiple AC trolls, multiple sock puppet accounts...

a bully threatens you

I'm not threatening you. I'm promising you that I'm going to keep pointing out your horrible on-line behavior. The way you treat people you don't agree with on this site is deplorable.

Why?

Because I want you to change your behavior and quit being such a weird little OCD twerp. I want you to confess your sock puppetry, because confession is good for the soul.

You don't believe it, and in fact, probably can't believe it... but the reality is, I'm trying to help you. THIS IS AN INTERVENTION! STOP TREATING PEOPLE POORLY!!

Yeah, yeah... I'm a troll account. At least the people I've trolled knew I liked them and knew that I was just roasting them.

I'll let you in on another secret.

Half the people I inducted into the old "Dumbass Hall Of Fame" WROTE THEIR OWN INDUCTIONS. In other words, they were in on the joke.

---------------------------

Yeah, you read that last part right.

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The complete undressing of damn_registrars.

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 2 years ago Greatness Here

There is no reason to believe that statement.

Of course there is. I've (eventually) claimed all my sock puppet accounts, and this one is no different.

Want me to try and remember the password for darn_registrars and use that again?

But... playing your little semantic games gives you away. Why would you make such an obvious error?

Answer: Because you have to in order to keep up the charade that you aren't behind the AC trolls that follow *every single one* of the posts I make. Let's face it dude, we've already established that you're the only one with the required OCD to pull that off.

Therefore, logically, it benefits you in this silly game to play stupid - except in order to successfully play stupid, you can't actually be stupid, and you are.

I'm not denying anything. I have no sock puppet accounts, period.

So you follow a statement that you're not denying anything with a *gasp* denial that you use sock puppet accounts.

Jeez, man, you're making this too easy.

So let me reiterate: YOU, damn_registrars, are clearly behind the AC postings that reply to nearly every single post of mine. YOU, damn_registrars, are using the AC postings to laughably make a claim that this account belongs to you, even though this account is one of mine (Red).

The reason you do this is quite simple: You are embarrassed at being caught playing dumb little sock puppet and AC trolling games. You are quite likely afraid of your real identity being found out and someone you're repeatedly and obsessively harassed and stalked on this site pointing that fact out and giving you real world consequences of your actions.

And perhaps worst of all, you are upset that despite your delusional self image of yourself as the "smartest person in the room" - as witnessed by your posting history, you're been repeatedly out-smarted, out-witted, and completely outclassed by an account(s) you try to simply dismiss as a troll.

That being all said....

HOW'S MY ASS TASTE?

Love and Kisses,

Red

-----------------------------

You know, what's really kind of funny is that I keep warning him he's about to completely step in it, and that I'm going to make him look like a complete idiot - and, since he is, he just marches right ahead and steps in it, and after the shit is smeared all over his shoes and floor, he makes the claim that it's chocolate ice cream!

damn_registrars=pudge_confirmer=jimmy_slimmy=raiigunner=cml4524=a_klavan=red4men=ronpaulisanidiot

pudge, railgunner, roman_mir and others might be too big of pussies - or idiots - to call you out on your repeated obsessive-compulsive harassment and stalking, not to mention your sock puppetting and AC trolling, damn_registrars, but I'm not.

NO MORE MR. NICE GUY

Death and Taxes,

Red

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For once I'm glad to be extremely busy.

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 3 years ago

No time to troll means no time spent looking at this horrible redesign. What drugs were they on when they came up with this, and where can I get some?

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I need a massage!

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

If only there were a journal spammer that could help me find a place to get a massage. ... and release my second chakra. HAPPY ENDING!

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Reality Check

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

McChrystal is a liberal democrat who voted for Obama. To those who think the GOP will run McChrystal in 2012 - Have you even read the Rolling Stone Article or are you just being a partisan dumbass?

THIS STUPIDITY IS WHY YOU DESERVE IT WHEN I TROLL YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.

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Some Chatroulette Tips From Your Pal Red

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

If you connect with some dude wanking off, make fun of his lack of endowment. In fact, you can tell him that the only reason he's doing that is because there's no chance at all he'd ever please a woman with such inadequate equipment. Eventually, he'll be shamed into hiding. Unless he doesn't speak English. Or he's Canadian like Captain Splendid, in which case he's so emasculated he's lucky to have a penis at all. Tell that guy to pull away, eh? Tim Hortons, eh?

If you connect with a celebrity, you're being trolled. Hell, it might even be me. One way to test is to intentionally talk about revolting things like necrophilia, an if Jessica Alba doesn't look disgusted, it ain't really her. Don't be a dumbass and fall for such an easy troll.

This has been a public pubic service announcement from your pal Red.

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So I took a page from mcgrew

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

mostly because I was bored, and got a hummer for 10 bucks. I would have left a tip, but I already gave her the whole thing.

Wow, that joke sucked. I should troll myself for even posting it.

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Slashdot - come here for the stories..

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

... and stay for the girl fight between two dudes who were all choppy-choppy on their pee-pees.

You're so vain... you probably think this post was about you.

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Miami STD Test Spammer

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Dumbass. Slashbots don't need STD testing - all they do is masturbate to pr0n all day. Talk about failing to know your target audience.

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Haiti relief effort as useless as Katrina relief effort.

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Clearly, Barack Obama hates black people.

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Hey, remember when...

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Barack Obama said he'd capture Bin Laden, that he wouldn't take his eye off the ball, blah... blah... blah...

It's been a year, dumbass. Let's see some results.

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What kind of dumbass...

Red4man Red4man writes  |  more than 4 years ago

What kind of dumbass needs a Teleprompter to talk to a bunch of fucking 6th graders?

SHOVE A HOT POKER UP YOUR ASS AND SPIN,
Red

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