Windows 8 Even Less Popular Than Vista
You can install Start8 to solve the first two problems, and the task bar thing is an option that can be changed by right clicking on the task bar.
Ask Slashdot: Typing Advice For a Guinness World Record Attempt?
Get a decent mechanical keyboard if you want to go for the record - probably a Filco Majestouch 2 with Cherry MX Blue switches, although you could also go for a Topre Realforce if you wanted something a bit quieter and lighter.
Forbes Names Microsoft's Steve Ballmer Worst CEO
Left 4 Dead 2 Announced For November
I've heard that the Scout from TF2 will make an appearance... BOINK!
Fun Fact: Every book review posted on Slashdot gives nine out of ten.
US Government to Have Only 50 Gateways
You'll never get enough Zealots out with only fifty Gateways...