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Every Day Is Goof-Off-At-Work Day At the US Patent and Trademark Office

VortexCortex Re:Deadlines. . . whoosh! (327 comments)

As an independent developer who has become homeless after a patent lawsuit even though it was bogus and later thrown out by someone with the money to fight back. FUCK YOU.

about 6 months ago

Oracle Hasn't Killed Java -- But There's Still Time

VortexCortex Re:Nobody kills Java (371 comments)

Eventually your system will either collect enough entropy that it will suck ass and die -- OR, you'll pull your head from your anus, implement a meta complier that generates code in Java or C or whatever flavor of the month, decouple your business from any single platform's destiny, and survive into the future.

Yes, code generation is key. That's what compilers are: Machine code generators -- but not shitty incomplete code generators that have no full language of their own. That's the difference between Java or a Meta Compiler or C or your POS garbage that no one understands but you.

about 6 months ago

Cornering the Market On Zero-Day Exploits

VortexCortex Re:The answer is to lessen the bugs at the source (118 comments)

You'll have to start at the language level. Trigraphs? WTF? En\
d of line continuations absolutely anywhere?

Protip: Languages that are a nightmare to lex parse and implement have terrible security. You made your own bed, now die in it.

about 6 months ago

How Google Handles 'Right To Be Forgotten' Requests

VortexCortex Re:Orwell's Memory Hole (135 comments)

And while you pine for that which never was, I'll simply scratch my head and think, "Well, the Internet IS a single point of failure, innit?"

about 6 months ago

How Google Handles 'Right To Be Forgotten' Requests

VortexCortex Re:Try to make me forget. (135 comments)

available more easily and to a much wider audience than would otherwise be the case.

What the fuck does this even mean when 4chan and the Streisand Effect exist? Go leap in a tar pit, you're retarding the herd.

about 6 months ago

How Many Members of Congress Does It Take To Pass a $400MM CS Bill?

VortexCortex I imagine it went down like this: (180 comments)

What if we just manufacutred criminals by making it illegal to tamper with a URL bar's contens, and then taught every kid to code!

"Genius! This thing prints money!"

-- Reform the fucking CFAA. Every kid has a million times more accessibility to coding and information than when I taught myself at age 8. If you're not coding it's either because you don't want to, or your parents are fucking daft.

about 6 months ago

Getting Back To Coding

VortexCortex Re:Change for the sake of change (240 comments)

Here's news for you mate. There is no shortage of skilled workers. There is only capitalistic elites applying very strict selection requirements via flavor of the month bullshit requirements (ignoring that coders learn new languages without having to get a degree or cert). This is done so they can pretend to be looking for workers, when in fact they are trying NOT to hire anyone so they can meet the government's requirements and employ more lower paid H1B visa workers. There are actually HR seminars about how NOT to hire people while still complying with the requirements of looking for work. "Oh my, you don't have a Certificate or Degree in $LANG, I'm afraid that's a requirement. Yes, you may say you know it, but how do I know that?" In fact, they just filter all applicants by their strict filter and you don't even get interviewed. They have to interview a few folks, just to seem legit, but that's the nature of this beast.


about 6 months ago

Getting Back To Coding

VortexCortex Welcome to the Next Level. (240 comments)

I reached that point in the 90's.

Now I write all my code in a meta language that compiles down into COBOL, C, C++, C#, Erlang, FORTH, Fortran, Google's Go, Haskel, Java, Javascript, Perl, PHP, Python, Ruby, Rust, and more.

It takes about two weeks for me to learn a new language and write the "runtime" for my meta compiler. Then I can deploy all of my existing solutions on the new platform faster than the other guys can get "Hello DB Connection" out the door.

Fuck all the shitty languages and "new" platforms. Now that you've actually grown up and stopped being a fucking fanboy, go write your own meta compiler. I'll open source mine when I retire, it's what gives me the edge over all the noobs still wasting time reimplementing their wheels.

about 6 months ago

Watch Dogs Released, DRM Troubles

VortexCortex Re:Ubisoft and PCs... (123 comments)

Sadly, those initial month of sales are the most important. Wait a few months and it's about the same as not even buying it -- Disappears into the statistical background noise of all the other back-catalog titles.

Unfortunately everything in gamedev is designed to squeeze the most effort out of the least advantaged: From chips to memory to humans. The publisher makes nothing, they add no real value to the product. The work to make the product is done, so they leverage artificial scarcity to recoup their losses -- Killing studios if they overestimated ROI. Quality isn't their concert, and won't be until players don't rush to buy shit, and the artists / devs / testers are treated well.

The silly thing is: The game developers could just work directly for the players. They could say: Hey, we want to make this game, it'll cost $PRICE. They can negotiate payment up front, do the work, get paid, and then "give the game away" to the players (since the work has already been paid for) just like they do working under a publisher. No need for DRM because you have an unlimited monopoly over your work before you do it. Can't pirate what's not created, so don't create what's not paid for. This has the interesting advantage that you actually waste less time making shit that no one will pay for. It's the same money as working under a publisher, just without the publisher driving up the cost. Games are cheaper to buy for the consumers, and so you can charge a bit more for the development to meet in the middle. Alleviate some crunch.

The only problem is: Kickstarter. This idea is fucked. Instead of asking for the full amount up front that you actually need, you ask the public to pay for a small portion of the funds, and then waste a chunk of the money on giving them "perks". Does your mechanic throw in perks for working on your car? Why the fuck should the over-extended underfunded game devs who are crunching like mad for you have to throw in perks for working on games? Also, design is a process, so being locked into following Kickstarter promises would limit the feasibility of completing a game. Doom would have had remained single player with character select screen, and RPG elements instead of fast paced frenetic deathmatches. Quake would have been an overly ambitious MMO that fell short of budget and died. Halo would have remained a Real Time Strategy game instead of becoming the Killer App for a console. Portal2 wouldn't have had GLaDOS, Chell or portal guns, and would have had to be canceled since F-Stop and movable terrain didn't work as a sequel. Tetris wouldn't have even ever been a game: It would have been an AI sim for packing shipping crates.

Clearly, markets are changing. There needs to be some form of middle ground. You don't want DRM? Fund the damn development. Don't want to take that big of a risk in case the game fails? Do it in installments, and have devs show progress. Allow features to get cut and re-designed, because that's how games are made: None spring fully formed from the design documents, those just provide a hopeful direction to proceed in, but there's no telling where you end up, especially if the requirement is to be "entertaining".

The publishers are spending several times more on Advertising than game development! That $60 game? You could pay $30 directly to devs for it to be made, and they'd STILL have MORE budget than what the DRM happy Publishers are paying out for the game to actually be made.

Any economist not hanging their head in shame at the current state of the information industries is a fool, and the players buying $60 games with DRM on them instead of having free copies of every game ever made for everyone by simply having the community fund the gamedev are just as ridiculous. Can't really blame the latter though, gamedevs still choose to work for Publishers and all-or-nothing "Crowdfunding" shite like Kickstarter is only partial funding with a bunch of additional constraints and burdens -- thus when the games are made, they devs have to try to leverage artificial scarcity, DRM, etc. to monetize the work since they're only able to ask for part of the funds.

You don't like DRM? IT'S YOUR OWN DAMN FAULT IT EXISTS. Sorry, it is. We have the technology to obliterate need for such artificial scarcity. We can get paid to do work once, like every other labor market. Folks like me want to end piracy by applying the FLOSS model to Gamedev, but we're ahead of our time, so we can't quit our day-jobs, yet. Someday it'll happen though. Market forces tend towards efficiency.

about 8 months ago

Watch Dogs Released, DRM Troubles

VortexCortex Give the AI folks more resources, FFS. (123 comments)

As dazzling as the game can look, this Chicago feels like a place you travel through rather than a world you inhabit. Pedestrians gasp and gawp at car crashes, but exhibit no real life.

That's because they only give us AI devs 1% or 2% of the budget. If you stopped harping on about how amazing the graphics are and realized that games are interactive art and that it's the "rules and logic" (AI) that make a game happen, then we can sacrifice just a tiny bit of those graphics and physics to give you a vastly better gaming experience.

Until folks start talking about the "Immersive Environment" and including the AI, your games will feel as wooden and false as ever. Give AI More Resources!

about 8 months ago

German Court Rules That You Can't Keep Compromising Photos After a Break-Up

VortexCortex Re:Ridiculous (334 comments)

The only possible reasons to keep adult photo's after a relationship ends are unethical and immoral. Either the person wants to use them for revenge/smear purposes, or they are unable to cope with the termination of the relationship and need something to cling on to, or perhaps they have a porn collection that they want to supplement with an old girlfriend for masturbatory purposes. In all cases, that is unacceptable behavior and symptomatic of numerous possible mental disorders.

So says you. Seems you failed philosophy 101. I think all that's healthy as fuck, and part of the human experience. Who the fuck are you to tell me what I can and can't do in the privacy of my own home?

If a person dwells on a mental image of an ex, we would consider them sociopaths and dangerous.

You're right of your fucking rocker, mate. You're assuming a fuck-load of intent based on zero action. Get bent, you fool.

If they went around telling people what their ex looked like naked, we would think the same.

Are you even aware that you're trying to label every guy or girl who has ever pined for lost love or hung out with their friends "sociopaths" and "dangerous".

Why is a physical picture different than a mental picture? That's a rhetorical question, and the answer is [I'm a fucking idiot, and I don't know anything about reality so I ask stupid questions and make huge logical leaps]"

The physical picture isn't much different than a mental picture except I remember damn near everything that's ever happened to me all the way back to around my 3rd birthday, so my memories have proven more permanent than lots of photos, many of which burned in a house fire destroying family albums, along with some photos of deceased friends who passed away along with my girlfriend.

Fuck you for saying the few pics of them I still have left are signs of sociopathic or derangement. You may consider memory loss healthy, but I consider it a malfunction. Practice what you preach, idiot:

To claim that a relationship is wrong, or that two consenting adults planning a long term relationship can't do things in the bedroom is social retardation at it's finest.

To claim that being single is wrong, or that a consenting adult who's not harming anyone in private can't do things in their bedroom is the gourmet batshit Orwellian insanity. I'm glad I'm not a German and don't live in the EU (where they've enacted the Memory Hole law) so I don't have bend over and take the police state right up the place where you should go fuck yourself.

You might be an idiot who gave your ex some nudes and regretted it, so you like this ruling. However what you don't realize is this is just inching you long towards a bad place you don't want to be. Hey, have you seen what we can do with cybernetics and neurology now? FALSE MEMORIES. Yep. We can also identify where a memory is in the brain too, we can ERASE MEMORIES. How would you folks to leverage their right to be forgotten inside your skull? Oh you'd love it, I'm sure you're just wetting yourself thinking of all the fun you can have doing this to folks you now hate. See, you're the one that's not demonstrating the ability to empathize with normal human behavior. YOU'RE THE PSYCHO.

Eventually you'll get enough laws in place that you can't function without breaking them. It'll be no big deal at first because selective enforcement only holds the "really bad" offenders to the rules. You know, the folks who do this shit to celebrities and officials. Then one day you'll realize that these laws aren't being applied equally. Then you'll realize the definition of what's acceptable has changed and so have the penalties when you weren't looking. Then you'll say or do something some pompous powerful plutocrat doesn't like, and you'll be taking your turn in the slammer. Enjoy your distended anus in the police state prison.

You'd think Germany of all places would have learned their lesson about this shit, but I guess not. Next time you fuckers decide to shove this totalitarian bullshit on your surrounding neighbors, the only thing your country will be good for is studying new breeds of radiation resistant cockroaches.

+5 Insightful

I smell some Social Justice Feminazi bullshit all over these mods too. Fuck them just as much, if not moreso. Psycho bitches.

about 8 months ago

Ask Slashdot: Tech Customers Forced Into Supporting Each Other?

VortexCortex Re:Google (253 comments)

Every detail about one's life doesn't come cheap, bucko.

If my info was so worthless they wouldn't even have all those billions.

They can either pay me a cut of the ad revenue they make off me, or give me support. Otherwise, I don't fucking use them, and none of my friends or family will either because I'm who they ask about stuff like that, and I'm not beneath telling them half-truths that paint Google as more evil than Microsoft.

They better wise up: There's no such thing as too big to fail. There's too big to bail out though, and recent political events are just the ammunition competitors need. Compete on Customer Support, or it will bite you in the ass. Only monopolies can play the "fuck off, no support for you" game. Just wait and see what happens with AT&T (again), or Comcast. Google's ass is ripe for the chopping block. I despise Social Justice bullshit, but as a tool using creature I'm sure I can paint Google as the most misogynistic institution ever, based purely on facts. Thanks to the Squeaky Wheel, and Degrees of Bacon the critical mass of users it takes to destroy your business is a very small percent.

Keep pissing off users, and they'll pay with their ass.

about 8 months ago

DARPA Unveils Hack-Resistant Drone

VortexCortex Re:To quote the bard (107 comments)

While I agree, and in no way trust the words of defense contractors, this is a common sentiment that's usually applied a bit broadly. One must realize that all security is security through obscurity. Each bit of obscurity increases the effective security exponentially. Yes, it may very well be that not having access to the cipher algorithms in use only provides a few bits of security since they're likely using one of the existing cipher systems, however those are a few bits of security that do exist if not disclosed. Now, (this would be overkill), but let's say they are chaining multiple ciphers together, say, Plaintext -> RC4 -> AES -> Ciphertext, and lets say they repeat that loop N times. Apart from the ciphers themselves the number and order of ciphers and iterations of the loops adds a few more bits of security through obscurity. Each stage of unknown cipher adds a few more bits of security in the selection of that cipher.

Indeed, this is how a cipher itself is built up from the various cryptographic primitives such as mix-rows, S-boxes, XORs, Look-up-tables, processions along a curve, block-chaining strategies, etc. reversible input to output mappings. I've just abstracted the process of constructing a cipher and described it using ciphers themselves in a way that can increase security exponentially even if you do know the details of the ciphers, but without knowing the details we can consider the system that much more secure. If the machine falls into enemy hands or details are leaked then our "element of surprise" bonus to the security is lost, but while it is not divulged it demonstrably more secure -- The same is true of cipher keys themselves, knowing a little bit of the key doesn't break the security but it weakens it; So consider these secret bits part of the key. All security is security by obscurity.

Now, purely hypothetically, let's say I built such a system that uses dual key expansions to derive both the key to use for the ciphers but also to seed a good random number generator which is then used to select which ciphers to chain together and in what order (perhaps the running time of iterations is computed to provide a fixe CPU load). Now, since the cryptographic primitives and implementations themselves have all been hacked on and accepted within the security community, this method of ciphering would also be considered at least as secure without really needing to vet the process. At worst its exponentially more secure than the currently accepted ciphers widely used today.

Do I really need to have everyone hack on this system to assure you it's safe? No. Not really. I could reveal the details to some trusted 3rd party, maybe call him Bruce Security. or BS for short. Then BS can be sworn to secrecy, and yet without revealing the details publicly or hammering on it BS could tell you: "Yes, this system is very secure, even more secure than any crypto system currently in use in the industry." And he'd be right even if such claims on the surface seem highly unlikely due to your own assumptions.

I make a similar argument in the practical vs worst-case time (big O notation) when selecting algorithms. For example: Red-Black Trees were chosen for C++'s map implementation. It was the "academically" and "provably correct" choice not to include hash-maps in the implementation instead or in addition. Practical folks said: FUCK! I need a damn hash-table, because its practical key-location case runs in constant-time, and I need that speed (one of the main reasons folks choose a compiled language). So, everyone went off and made their own hash-table implementations for their maps, some folks even drug out their existing C implementations and used them. Later, since everyone was demanding the standards board pull its head from its ass and give us what we want, they finally added a hash-table implementation in C++2011. However, now we have a bunch of existing codebases using non-standard hash-map implementations which will remain in place (because if it's not broke don't fix it), and now we have exponentially more CPU cycles compared to decades past so the inclusion of hash-table based maps is actually a bit moot at this point. So, the "academically provably correct" decision was actually detrimental in practical terms. They'd have had hast-tables in the STL long ago then we could have avoided a needles chunk of legacy maintenance headache.

In other words: The rule of thumb is: Rarely does any rule govern all thumbs. Common wisdom has typically been foolishly dumbed down. The wise avoid speaking in absolutist terms, there are almost always exceptions. While it's true that showing off the code would allow us to vet whether or not the code is secure, we're likely to miss at least some bugs anyway. It would be equally reassuring to have it vetted by a 3rd party and to listen to their B.S. saying it's secure... Time is a good test too, in practice. It would be prudent to proceed with caution; However, note that the current drones aren't very secure. You can crash them via jammer and tune into their video feed with your old school TV set, so any obscurity at all -- even an XORing everything with a single constant byte value -- would be better than the security we've currently got.

Note, they'd be correct in saying even just a constant-byte value XOR was "hack resistant" in "academically provably correct" terms, which is why one should typically expect BS.

about 8 months ago

DARPA Unveils Hack-Resistant Drone

VortexCortex Re:This is just silly (107 comments)

Well, I think this is a bit different. Such comments may be apt to other offerings, but this uses industrial strength military grade antibacterial hypoalergenic drone security best practices.

about 8 months ago

DARPA Unveils Hack-Resistant Drone

VortexCortex Re:"mathematically proven" (107 comments)

"To determine who really rules, all you hafta do is ask: Who am I not allowed to misquote?"
- Voltaire

about 8 months ago

Facebook Refuses To Share Employee Race and Gender Data

VortexCortex Re:Stupid is as stupid does (250 comments)

White Males make up 77% of the USA. Is any company with less than this percentage racist? Affirmative Action: Utterly bogus.

about 8 months ago


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