If I must read a bit of spam, I'd rather it be ...
Displaying poll results.18616 total votes.
Most Votes
- What's the highest dollar price will Bitcoin reach in 2024? Posted on February 28th, 2024 | 8480 votes
- Will ByteDance be forced to divest TikTok Posted on March 20th, 2024 | 7386 votes
Most Comments
- What's the highest dollar price will Bitcoin reach in 2024? Posted on March 20th, 2024 | 68 comments
- Will ByteDance be forced to divest TikTok Posted on March 20th, 2024 | 20 comments
Missing option (Score:1)
About bitcoin
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
What're you talking about? It's the first one on the list!
Re: (Score:3)
"If you must read a bit of spam" - "not reading spam" is an invalid option....
Nigerian 419 scams won the ignobel prize (Score:1)
Because they were so interesting:
LITERATURE: The Internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria, for creating and then using e-mail to distribute a bold series of short stories, thus introducing millions of readers to a cast of rich characters -- General Sani Abacha, Mrs. Mariam Sanni Abacha, Barrister Jon A Mbeki Esq., and others -- each of whom requires just a small amount of expense money so as to obtain access to the great wealth to which they are entitled and which they would like to share with the kind person who assists them.
http://improbable.com/ig/ig-pastwinners.html#ig2005 [improbable.com]
Re: (Score:3)
Exactly. The 419 scam stories can be fun to read simply because of the audacity of the storytellers.
Re: (Score:2)
Glad to know I'm not the only one that reads them. It's like every time I get a new one I think "I wonder what our brave Nigerian Prince is up to in this week's episode!".
Re: (Score:2)
Yes prince Mbeki of the flashing eyes and booming baritone: charmer of ladies, freedom fighter, intellectual, and excellent dancer. It's really too bad what they've done to him over there. I can't wait to go fishing (phishing) with him in the Caribbean.
Ignobel, or worse (Score:3)
Because they were so interesting:
LITERATURE: The Internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria, for creating and then using e-mail to distribute a bold series of short stories, thus introducing millions of readers to a cast of rich characters -- General Sani Abacha, Mrs. Mariam Sanni Abacha, Barrister Jon A Mbeki Esq., and others -- each of whom requires just a small amount of expense money so as to obtain access to the great wealth to which they are entitled and which they would like to share with the kind person who assists them.
http://improbable.com/ig/ig-pastwinners.html#ig2005 [improbable.com]
Exactly. One of the sleaziest which I received was just after the Concorde crash near Paris. A person claiming to represent a childless but wealthy German couple who had died in the crash sent me an email. The couple allegedly had squirelled away several millions in Swiss banks thus illegally evading German taxes. The "lawyer" was exhorting me to send a signed affadavit to the effect I was their legal heir, so that the inheritance could be redeemed and split with me. This signing of a false affadavit would
spam...spam...spam... (Score:2)
People
Are
Missing
Re: (Score:2)
Re:spam...spam...spam... (Score:4, Funny)
Stupid
Pointless
Acronyms
Make hulk smash!
Re: (Score:2)
Slashdot
Posters
Are
Malnurished
Re: (Score:2)
Well, there's spam, eggs, sausage and spam. That's not got much spam in it.
Re: (Score:3)
Some
People
Are
Missing
I think your confusing SPAM with Soylent Green.
Re: (Score:2)
Some People Are Missing
I think your confusing SPAM with Soylent Green.
Open a can and leave it on a warm shelf for a week, then, it will be green.
I like to read spam about.... (Score:1)
Spammers being clubbed to death
At least in a Roman character set (Score:2)
Re: (Score:1)
I can only recognise a few Chinese characters, but all the Chinese (Usenet-)spam I've tried to decipher was quite obviously for porn. Lonely geeks must be bored behind the Great Firewall.
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
No. First line from the wikipedia article [wikipedia.org] (emphasis mine): "UTF-8 (UCS Transformation Format — 8-bit) is a multibyte character encoding for Unicode. Like UTF-16 and UTF-32, UTF-8 can represent every character in the Unicode character set."
Re: (Score:3)
Couldn't you just set a filter that says "if it doesn't contain 'the' or 'is' or 'and' mark it as spam" (or choose you own better short list of words that would be in all messages written in your language).
That would also have the advantage of skipping emails from the young "txt msg" generation.
Re: (Score:2)
i keep getting Chinese & Indian spam trying to sell me heavy industrial equipment
Obligatory missing choice (Score:2)
Time travel!
But I guess that's not really spam.
Re: (Score:2)
Time travel!
But I guess that's not really spam.
It is in the time that I come from.
Re: (Score:2)
I think that would be a 419 spam.
"Hello I am from the future, I will be your butler, my current master told me to contact you about this, I know exactly how the stock market will work for the next few decades, If you must pay my master (You is you in the future as you know) a modest sum of $100 where it will be invested most effectively. You will be a rich man. I know you wouldn't delete this email as you have already replied and paid the $100"
Predictions (Score:1)
Somehow I expect quite a few down-modded comments based solely on pr0n.
Hurry up 'n buy every TLD imaginable while you can (Score:2)
Dear CEO,
We are big important registrar and $FICTICIOUS_COMPANY wants to buy from us this follows:
$YOUR_HOSTNAME.cn
$YOUR_HOSTNAME.tw
$YOUR_HOSTNAME.com.cn
$YOUR_HOSTNAME.com.tw
(et cetera)
Sometimes the poor English can be entertaining.
Re: (Score:2)
Spam localized using web translators (Score:3)
Sometimes, I get spam in Finnish that has been clearly translated with some automated translator (google, babelfish). Makes for hilarious reads...
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:3)
It's all greek to me.
Re: (Score:2)
It gets even better: I get auto-translated Greek spam!
Isn't Greek spam just gay porn spam?
Re: (Score:2)
Yes, because all Greeks are gay. Nothing else has ever happened in Greece since thousands of years ago when homosexuality was nothing special there.
Ad spam: finanancial scams (Score:2)
Recently I've bitten the bullet and started to use Facebook quite regularly. So sue me.
What I noticed almost immediately about Facebook was the content of the ads on the right-hand side of my browser window: many "make money fast" and "work from home, just two hours a day" type of advertisements. I haven't really looked into what they offer, as they are typically frauds. If it sounds too good to be true, then that's usually the case.
Now of course Facebook is in the business of selling ads, but it does mak
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
Everyday I click "offensive" on a lot of ads just to mess with the marketing scheme.
Re: (Score:2)
For a while I was "Widowed" on Facebook because when I cycled through the possible states, all of them generated women-for-sale ads except Widowed - which had a GT40 ad. I was hooked, and only recently gave in to honesty. That, and no more exotic car ads.
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
My profile lists my gender and age only.
Interestingly the ads are in Dutch (a preferred language in my browser) though my location (they can see that from my IP) is in Hong Kong.
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
This is what I don't get. Facebook has a very large, and very captive audience. Why can't they get real ads for serious products on their site? People spend more time on Facebook than they do watching NBC, but you don't see stuff like that on NBC (or any major TV network). Are serious companies not willing to pay for internet ads? Are these spammy companies willing to pay more? I'm not an advertising exec, but I think that Facebook would stand to make a lot more money if they only had ads from legitimate companies selling real products.
It's not that spammy companies are willing to pay more. It's that the cost of putting up a few ads is measured in dollars while a 30 second spot on a major network is likely measured in the tens if not thousands of dollars (or millions during the Super Bowl). Additionally, the major companies don't need to *pay* for advertising because they have their free facebook pages (i.e. advertisements) that people willingly go to.
You have noticed that nearly every commercial on TV now includes a url for the company
Re: (Score:2)
Medical claims. (Score:1)
Re: (Score:2)
All spam is irrelevant to me, but if I'm lucky it may be something to fap to.
Re: (Score:2)
I like my beer cold, my spam obvious, and my homosexuals raging.
Any, as long as it's funny (Score:5, Insightful)
I have a piece of spam I've saved because it made me laugh:
Dear Sir/Madam,
We have logged your IP-address on more than 30 illegal Websites.
Important:
Please answer our questions!
The list of questions are attached.
Yours faithfully,
Steven Allison
*** Federal Bureau of Investigation -FBI-
*** 935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW, Room 3220
*** Washington, DC 20535
*** phone: (202) 283-7934
That was from "Departament879@fbi.com" Like the FBI has a .COM address. Fantastic. Of course, I'm sure the "attached list of questions" is something nasty, so that's as far as ol' Steve and I went.
Re: (Score:2)
Just for grins I tried connecting to www.fbi.com and got this....
"Firefox can't establish a connection to the server at 0.0.0.0."
I don't think I've ever had that particular response before.
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Re: (Score:2)
nutritioncenter.com
watermelon.com
watermelons.com
watermelon.net
fbi.com
navigate.net
navigate.com
trucktrailors.com
Re: (Score:2)
Interestingly enough, fbi.com (it's IP address of 216.234.246.150) is owned by "HappyDays, Inc" which is run by a guy named Scott Day who owns a BUNCH of nice domain names.
HappyDays, Inc? Is Scott the new Fonz?
Re:Any, as long as it's funny (Score:4, Funny)
Interestingly enough, fbi.com (it's IP address of 216.234.246.150) is owned by "HappyDays, Inc" which is run by a guy named Scott Day who owns a BUNCH of nice domain names.
HappyDays, Inc? Is Scott the new Fonz?
He jumped the shark years ago.
Re: (Score:3)
Re:Any, as long as it's funny (Score:4, Interesting)
Re: (Score:2)
I did. All I got was "It works!" Odd, very odd.
Re: (Score:2)
Good old Debian! Love that message. :-)
Re: (Score:3)
It's your own default Apache install, quad-zero routes to localhost on Linux.
Re: (Score:2)
>>A while back, I started keeping a list of spam subject lines that I thought were particularly funny.
Me too. My favorite one was for some sort of dating service: "Come join the Farty!"
Uh... no thanks.
Re: (Score:2)
Yeah, right.... (Score:2)
Like an average /. reader needs Viagra...
Re: (Score:2)
Speaking of Viagra, my personal favorite spam subject line was "Max Gentleman Enlargement Pills". Love it or hate it, some spam really makes you laugh.
Spam sandwiches (Score:3)
I feel kind of bad for Hormel, all the more so because they've been such great sports about people using "spam" to mean junk email. I know this is going to be heresy, but: I kind of like Spam (the meat product). I wouldn't want to eat out of the can with a fork, but my dad used to fry it with onions to make an awesome sandwich.
Re: (Score:2)
My favorite way of cooking spam is a method we used in boy scouts, fried on a rock in the fire. It got rid of a lot of the grease and had a nice smoked flavor. Frying it up with onions does sound delicious, was it cut into patties or just done up like hamburger is for tacos?
Also if you are in Minnesota there is "Spam Town USA" according to the signs when entering Austin, MN. There you can visit the Spam Museum [spam.com] plus it is free and not government run so it is open even though the rest of the state is shut do
Re: (Score:2)
That sounds awesome! There's nothing that can't be improved by cooking it outside. Dad used to slice it maybe 3/8" thick; I've never tried it chopped.
I live in northeast Nebraska, but the only time I've been to MN recently was when I was already in Sioux Falls for a softball tournament and drove far enough into MN to get my Gowalla badge.
Re: (Score:2)
i was scared for life from eating spam after watching someone make it once.
he took the can - opened the top and set it on a propane burner (one of the small backpacking ones).. as it warmed up and the grease came out we watched as the meat rose out of the can, when it was almost all the way out he turned the heat down and we just watched it slowly fall back into the can.. he then took it and ate it out of the can..
sorry that much grease - there is zero way i could eat that stuff.
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Next to hot dogs and grilled cheese, SPAM sandwiches were among the first things I ever learned to cook. Pan fry 1/4" slabs of SPAM, sprinkle pepper and a little sugar. Alternative is sweet soy sauce. Really great tasting actually, the whole sweet/salty/greasy thing...
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
419 scam for me (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
Re: (Score:2)
I'll save you from some work. If the GP just posts his e-mail here, he will get way more spam than you can possibly send to him.
Re: (Score:2)
Just post your email address to publicly accessible forums and it will happen.
Legitimate sounding (Score:3)
I like the ones that sound legitimate, because it can be kind of fun investigating the background behind the phishing attack and seeing the new tactics being used to draw you in.
They used the wrong poll title (Score:4, Funny)
Re: (Score:2)
When in Rome, they do as he does.
Stay thirsty, my friend.
Green card legal services, of course. (Score:2)
What else?
Re: (Score:2)
Well, maybe a DEC minicomputer. Or a dinette set.
Time Drive (Score:5, Interesting)
Re: (Score:2)
The back story makes for interesting reading. Really. I kind of enjoyed those spams.
http://www.google.com/search?q=time+travel+spammer [google.com]
Re: (Score:2)
If there are time travellers out there it would be silly not to ask.
Re:Time Drive (Score:4, Funny)
That was the biggest scam ever. They never had a time machine at all but were trying to assemble one from all the "spare parts" donated to them.
Re: (Score:2)
Volunteer Wanted [photobucket.com]
Re: (Score:2)
So did you ride your skateboard down there? Did you remember to bring the video camera?
Re: (Score:2)
I once got a spam asking me to invest in mining on Saturn. It was the only SPAM message I have wished to be true.
My Wife's Favorite (Score:2)
My wife's favorite spam was titled: "Meet men with bigger breasts". She looks at me, bursts out laughing, and says "why would I want to meet men with big breasts?"
My favourite was ... (Score:2)
"Men used to laugh at my $string1 and women $string2 my $string3 until I took these miracle pills, and now I am built like a $string4"
I never knew there were so many synonyms for the part of the male anatomy that the pills targeted. Mark you, I don't get out much.
Re: (Score:2)
I sometimes get them with the $strings untranslated.
suicide note (Score:2)
The only spam I'd enjoy reading is the (actual, not faked) suicide note of the spammer who can't resist sending out one last spam.
I don't know what's up with spam these days. I have three layers of spamfilters (greylisting, spamassassin and in the mail client) and I still get more spam than ever before getting through.
Can we please revisit the discussion about the death penalty for spammers? This time, I'd like to add that death is not enough, it should be long, extremely painful, and broadcasted on public
Spoetry (Score:2)
I actually enjoyed some of the bits and bobs of classic literature that had been run through a blender, cut, pasted, and formatted into paragraphs to get by word filters. Sometimes these little gems are buried in the mixed/multipart message that you don't actually see with web mail. It's been a while since I've used that kind of reader so I wonder if that technique was defeated.
Potted meat product? (Score:2)
The mental image conjured by "potted meat product" is kind of disturbing.
"Oh, you've got a greenhouse? Look at all these pretty flowers! And what a lovely bonsai — WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??? AND WHY OH GOD WHY IS IT GENTLY WAVING IN THE BREEZE???"
Missing option (Score:2)
I can't imagine circumstances where I'd care (Score:2)
I'm having trouble with the basic concept. I can't imagine any circumstance where I'd voluntarily read spam, so that only leaves scenarios like: somebody is holding a gun to my head. In a case like that, I'm not going to care about the content, I'll read whatever spam you want to put in front of me. Sir. (Or Madam as the case may be.)
So, I guess my answer is...short! :)
missing options complaint (Score:2)
If I must read a bit of spam, I prefer it to be pure nonsense where I can't even tell what they're selling or where they want me to download malware from. I don't see 'em anymore, but does anyone else remember the randomly-selected text spams? Just a few paragraphs of poorly written text about anything, without so much as a clue as to what they're trying to manipulate me into doing. Even if I wanted to give into the spammer, I wouldn't know how. No promises of riches or a bigger penis. No green cards.
Re: (Score:1)
Re: (Score:2)
your penis is steamy. that's weird.
That brings back memories of the engineer's song [tiscali.co.uk].
Genital spam can be confusing... (Score:2)
your penis is steamy. that's weird.
My penis is a D-cup!
Seriously, for a while one of the spammer databases must have got my gender confused, because for a couple of months some years back, I received a litany of breast enlargement spam (lotions, magic diets, herbs, etc.) presumably aimed at insecure girls. Of course, at the same time I was also getting the usual wiener-growth wonder pill spam.
Re: (Score:2)
plus, it's among the easiest to identify, ignore, and filter (well, unless you have really interesting friends, but who of us here does?).
PLUS, if it includes pictures, then they've already pretty much delivered the product. Woo!